David Rossi: Guide and Owner's Manual
by Erestory
Summary: Since of finding women's underware in the living room? Wondering whats in the little black book? Read the manual


David Rossi: Guide and Owner's Manual

Congratulations!

You are now the owner of a fully automated **Rossi** unit. To ensure that you get the full use and benefits of your professional profiler, please pay close attention to the following instructions.

**Basic Information: **

**Name: **David Rossi

**Date Of Manufacture: **Year of 1947

**Place Of Manufacture: **C&M, New York

**Height: **Around 6'2"

**Weight: **Unknown

**Your Rossi unit will come with the following accessories:**

Two suits

1 loaded gun

Two casual outfits

Two pairs of shoes

FBI badge

Black Book

When you first open your **Rossi **unit, he may be watchful and tense. Show him your place and he shall open up.

**Cleaning: **The **Rossi **unit is fully capable of cleaning himself and will keep the house clean for you.

**Programming:**

Your **Rossi** unit is perspective and tough, and can carry out the following functions:

**Storyteller: **Being an author **Rossi** tells excellent stories and keep people of all ages occupied.

**Profiler: **As one of the original profilers he is one of the best and can solve anything

**Date: **He's mature, charming and handsome. You will have no problem convincing him to be your date and you will have a heck of a time.

**Coach: Rossi** is a tough cookie and believes in tough love. He won't sugar you and baby you but he will look after you and make sure you got what it takes to survive.

**Your **_**Rossi**_** unit comes with four different modes:**

Calm

Profiler

Annoyed

Romeo

The calm mode is activated whenever **Rossi** is with other units in a friendly setting like a restaurant, date or nights out on the town. He will laugh, joke and crack a smile more.

_Romeo_ is activated when **Rossi** is around beautiful women or potential wives, girlfriends and lovers. He will watch, smooth talk, buy jewelry, flirt and date.

The _annoyed _mode is activated when **Morgan, Spencer,** **Garcia **and **Prentiss** units put them selves in danger, pull pranks on each other, is late or crosses the line.

The profiler mode is activated when **Rossi **is on a case or something big happens like a mail-box is knocked over or a cat is stolen.

_**Reaction to other units:**_

**Spencer Reid**: This unit is a fan to the **Rossi** Unit and looks up to him. The **Spencer **Unit often rants which sometimes annoy him but they get on great.

**Derek Morgan**: This unit is a friend, but he will occasionally annoy **Rossi** with his big-bad complex and reaction towards god-related things.

**Jason Gideon**: These units have little to no connect so everything might be all right.

**Elle Greenaway**: These two have no connect.

**Aaron Hotchner**: This unit is a friend, and there is mutual respect and admiration. They might jump down each other throats everyone now and then but it's all good.

**Emily Prentiss**: These units are friends but the **Prentiss** unit sometimes tries to profile the **Rossi** unit but there is no harm between them.

**JJ**: This unit is good friends with your unit. He will grow to have deep respect for **JJ** but everything will be all right.

**Penelope Garcia**: She is one of the **Rossi** unit's friends, things get tense after she is shot but things will smooth over.

**Ex-Wives: **Things are tense so don't leave them alone.

**Frequently Asked Questions**

**Q: **My **Rossi **unit is tense and keeps looking at the charm bracelet and won't tell me why. What is going on?

**A: **He must be working on the one case that stayed with him. Give him lots of time and things will settle down.

**Q: **My unit had a fight with my best friend's **Hotch **and now there not talking and we are scared to leave them in a room together. How do we fix this?

**A: **Give them a new case and make them thing children are in dire need and they will get over it. Or have a **Morgan **step in.

**Q: **One of Rossi's ex-wives tracked him down and they had a heated conversation and now he left and I can't find him. What can I do?

**A: **Find a **Spencer** and he will track him down and bring him back. Just wait patiently and he'll come back home.

Q: I accidently burned up **Rossi**'s black book and now he won't even LOOK at me let alone talk and I can't stand the silence. What do I do?

A: My advice? Present him with a new book wearing victoria secret while begging for forgives on your knees. Or just be a suck up the rest of your live. He might forgive you.

**Q: Rossi** has been taking me out to dinner and presenting me with gifts and I'm loving it. I know he has a reputation as a Casanova but I can't help being happy. What can I do?

**A: **Be smart, be safe, and be happy.

**Warranty: **With proper care, the **Rossi **unit will grow old and eventually die, unless a unsub or accident kills him. However, if you get annoyed with the mature casanova, you can always send him back to our company for a full refund (within 12 months of purchase).


End file.
